I got chris browned last night
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize