he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
