party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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