Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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