Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
