So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
