I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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