I hope mine doesn't look like that
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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