Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
