She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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