Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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