He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
