Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
