so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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