I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize
