No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
