Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
