definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
