Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize