I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize