Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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