I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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