Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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