We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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