Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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