why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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