This is evicking siegelnvs
This is fucking ridiculous*
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.