God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Sorry about my life...
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize