yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
