Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Randomize
