I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
