I don't usually arrange sex via text message
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i just had sex bonerless
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way