god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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