Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?