So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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