I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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