He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
