apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
