just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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