You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
