I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
We got so high we made milksteak
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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