I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
