This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize