He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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