So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize