Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
