For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize