My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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