I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize