so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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